THE SELF-MANAGEMENT OF ANXIETY: SOME PRACTICAL CONSIDERATIONS
There are a number of practical points which I always explain very carefully to patients. In addition, to be quite sure that I get these ideas across, I repeat them in different words each time I see the patient. The reason is that these practical considerations are so simple that the patient is likely to think, “Oh yes,” and ignore the matter as too obvious to be thought about seriously.
I have another way of impressing these very simple ideas on the patient. I like to see the patient together with the person who is closest to him. If the patient is a man, I see him and his wife together; if it is the wife, I see her with her husband; young people I see with their parents; and the elderly with one of their children. I then explain these very simple things to them together. Then when the patient experiences temporary difficulty, or discouragement, he will naturally talk about it to the other person, who in turn will remind him that this is just what I warned him to expect. In order to apply this principle to your own case, I would suggest that you show this book to your wife or husband, and explain what you are doing.
With the patients whom I see in my consulting rooms I carry this principle even further. The patient and the person with him are sitting down talking with me while I explain things to them. When they are both fully at ease, I ask the patient just to show me for a moment how he can relax. He does this quite readily, as it fits into the context of our conversation. So it comes about that I give him his first lesson in his relaxing exercises in the presence of the other person. This helps to overcome a difficulty that many people experience. They tend to be rather
self-conscious about doing their exercises. They seem to want to creep away and do them without anyone else knowing what is going on. It becomes a secret! and what is worse, it can become a kind of guilty secret.
One woman told me that she could do the exercises very well, but it was difficult to find the time, as naturally she could only do them when there was no one else in the house! This, of course, is a completely wrong approach; and I have discouraged it by having the patient do the exercises with the wife or husband sitting naturally in the room with me.
If you are a quick reader, now is the time to slow down a little, and let these simple ideas really sink into your mind. It would be foolish to miss the chance of real help by being too quick. Skimming through this is not enough. It requires more than that. The ideas must be absorbed. When I have the patient with me I see to this by repeating the ideas in different words and on different occasions. In your case, read it, go with it, let it seep into you, and reread it again. Then you will see it work.
*54\57\2*
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.