The contacts seem to have been rather well distributed through earlier life rather than concentrated, since in age-specific incidence these offenders rank no higher than fifth until age-period 26-30 when their 3 per cent earns them fourth rank. Their maximum was 11 per cent (as is usual in the puberty to age fifteen period), with a subsequent gradual decrease to 3.

About 5 per cent had dreamed of such activity, and while this is a small number in absolute terms, it is the second largest number reported (the homosexual offenders vs. children, interestingly enough, rank first). A relatively and absolutely small number reported having fantasies of animals during self-masturbation. This minor conflict of data is inconsequential—too few persons have a well-developed sexual interest in animals to make it a useful tool in analyzing different sorts of sex offenders.

As we have stated previously, we regard much animal contact as a form of self-masturbation. While the masturbation frequencies of the homosexual offenders vs. adults were extremely high, the frequencies of animal contact were moderate. Animal contact is so uncommon that its frequency can be calculated for only some of our comparative groups and only for the years between puberty and age twenty. In such calculations of frequency among those having such activity, the homosexual offenders vs. adults reveal the lowest frequencies. For example, between sixteen and twenty the average (median) individual had 3.5 animal contacts a year in comparison with the 4 for the prison and heterosexual offenders vs. minors, the 9 for die heterosexual offenders vs. children, and the nearly 19 for the control group. As a matter of fact, the high frequency of animal contact in the control group is due to two aberrant individuals.

*211\161\2*

In age-specific incidence the single homosexual offenders vs. minors and adults tend to occupy the top of the rank-orders at various ages; the single homosexual offenders vs. children, however, have relatively moderate percentages from puberty through age twenty-five. After age twenty-five they too rise (as the more heterosexual individuals marry and leave the unmarried sample) and rank second in every age-period from twenty-six on, with nine out of ten masturbating. The idea that this high age-specific incidence is linked to homosexuality is reinforced by the examination of the age-specific incidence among the married (therefore less exclusively homosexual) homosexual offenders vs. children: here the incidence figures are moderate and never more than those of the control group.

Again, like the other homosexual offenders, the offenders vs. children tend to have a relatively large number of their members with high maximum frequencies of masturbation and relatively few with low. The maximum of the average (median) homosexual offender vs. children was 5.3 per week, a frequency substantially less than that of the other homosexual offenders, but sufficient to earn him sixth place in a rank-order.

The frequency of masturbation among the unmarried homosexual offenders vs. children is relatively high, ordinarily exceeded only by the other homosexual offenders. During the various age-periods the average (median) homosexual offender vs. children holds from second to fourth place in the rank-orders with frequencies ranging from nearly once a week to nearly twice a week.

Since, as we shall see, there is a strong positive correlation between homosexuality and frequent masturbation, it is not surprising to see the homosexual offenders vs. children ranking high in this respect. However, inasmuch as they are the least homosexually oriented of the three homosexual-offender groups, it is also not surprising to see them occasionally drop in the rank-orders to an intermediate status.

Interestingly enough, this trend toward high frequencies is evident also among married homosexual offenders vs. children: in the two age-periods for which we can calculate medians and means, they rank fourth or higher.

The high frequencies of masturbation are reflected in the proportions of total outlet derived from this activity. In fact, the unmarried homosexual offenders vs. children derived more of their outlet from masturbation than did any other group. They rank first in three age-periods, second in another, and fourth in yet another. Even in their late thirties and early forties these men were obtaining half of their orgasms through self-masturbation. This reliance on the self may have something to do with their interest in sexual partners of “inappropriate” gender and age; one might say they have made the job of finding a sexual partner doubly difficult and consequently fall back on masturbation. Note that the percentage of total outlet from masturbation always exceeds that derived from homosexual activity. The importance of masturbation is, not unexpectedly, less among the married, but even here the proportion of total outlet derived from masturbation is sometimes rather high.

Among the separated, divorced, or widowed there is a powerful resurgence of the importance of masturbation. From thirty-one to thirty-five the proportion of total outlet from masturbation is greater among these postmarital males than among the never married. This sort of recovery or bounce-back phenomenon suggests both heterosexual difficulties and a minimal influence of marriage on sexual pattern.

As one would expect, the homosexual offenders vs. children rank high (third with 69 per cent) in having homosexual fantasy while masturbating, being exceeded only by the other homosexual groups. This is in accord with their general psychologic responses: 55 per cent were sexually aroused by thinking of or seeing males, and one third reported their response was strong. Correspondingly, they rank low (86 per cent) in heterosexual fantasy. The only other point to note is a tendency to rank high in fantasy of sexual contact with animals; in this they are unlike the other homosexual offenders.

The homosexual offenders vs. children were not inclined to be concerned over the possible bad effects of masturbation; they worried about it in only slightly over one third of the years during which they masturbated.

These homosexual offenders rank second highest (40 per cent) in the number who learned of masturbation by being masturbated by someone else, exceeded only by the offenders vs. adults who had 47 per cent of their members having learned in this fashion. This is to be expected of a group with a considerable amount of prepubertal sex play that was strongly homosexual. A far below-average number had learned from talking, reading, or observation (25 per cent). It is somewhat unexpected that they also rank high in self-discovery of masturbation; here they are second in rank-order with 17 per cent. The explanation is that a large proportion (nearly half) masturbated before puberty, and of this number some 60 per cent (again a high figure) began before age ten—at such an early age the chances of self-discovery are greatly enhanced.

*169\161\2*

Slightly more than two thirds had coitus with their future (first) wives before marriage; this is the second largest proportion found among the comparative groups. Not surprisingly, they account for the fourth largest proportion of pregnant brides.

The incest offenders are our most fertile groups by far. The average incest offender vs. adults had five children, the incest offender vs. children three. In comparison the remaining groups are singularly infertile.

Turning to the more explicitly sexual aspects of marriage, we find that the incest offenders vs. children were inclined toward protracted precoital petting: nearly one third (third in rank-order) of them customarily spent half an hour or more in such activity. Correspondingly few reported brief foreplay. This dalliance is not typical of the other incest offenders.

Mouth-genital contact was an important technique in the marriages of the incest offenders vs. children as it had been in their nonmarital lives. More of them had experience in mouth-genital contact with their wives (some two thirds) than any other group. Three fifths had had both fellation and cunnilingus—again the largest percentage recorded. This emphasis on oral technique sets the incest offenders vs. children sharply apart from other incest offenders.

While the average incest offender vs. children ranks third and second in frequency of marital coitus in age-periods 16-20 and 21-25, he falls in rank-order thereafter, ultimately ranking next to lowest in age-period 36-40.

Since incest offenders as a whole tend to have low to intermediate frequencies of marital coitus, the incest offenders vs. children are aberrant only in having high frequencies (median) in their teens and early twenties. Note that from age twenty-six on, in the calculation of medians, the incest offenders vs. children are invariably adjacent to the incest offenders vs. minors in the rank-orders.

The tendency of incest offenders to have low or intermediate frequencies is seen in the mean frequencies of the incest offenders vs. children; in every age-period they occupy intermediate positions in the rank-orders, but always in the lower half. While less evident than in the case of the median frequencies, there is a tendency for the incest offenders vs. minors and incest offenders vs. children to be adjacent or near in the rank-orders.

The proportion of total sexual outlet constituted by marital coitus is always moderate, ranging from 81 to 91 per cent, the percentage decreasing with age.

Since the incest offenders vs. children so readily breached the taboo on mouth-genital contact, it is no surprise to find them highly tolerant of other techniques. More of them (95 per cent) than any other group had used coital positions other than the conventional one. Also the largest proportion (26 per cent) had had anal coitus with their wives.

When asked to evaluate the happiness of their marriages, they gave some curious answers. Only 15 per cent of their marital years, by far the fewest of any group, were very happy. This paucity of years in the very happy category permits the incest offenders vs. children to rank high in the other three categories of marital happiness: 39 per cent (first in rank) of the years moderately happy, 29 per cent (second) rather unhappy, and 17 per cent (fifth) very unhappy. In general it appears that these offenders are concentrated in the middle area—the moderately happy and rather unhappy categories—and only a few experienced the extremes of marital joy or sorrow. At the time of the beginning of the incestuous behavior, however, about two thirds of the offenders rated their marriages as rather unhappy or very unhappy.

*127\161\2*

Most of the men(40 per cent) were separated, divorced, or widowed; one third were married; and slightly over one quarter had never married. These proportions are not unlike those of the heterosexual offenders vs. adults. The high percentage of separated or divorced males is no surprise in view of their record of brief marriages.

The aggressors vs. children were more prone to have had a prior sex offense than their counterparts, the offenders vs. children. Among the latter, 40 per cent had committed a sex offense prior to the “offense vs. children”; among the former, the equivalent figure is 53 per cent. Similarly, a large number had had two prior sex offenses (30 per cent vs. nearly 20 per cent), and over one fifth had three prior sex offenses.

Despite this record, only 7 per cent of the aggressors vs. children were ever diagnosed as psychiatrically disturbed. Not one was under the influence of drugs at the time of the offense. On the other hand, there is a marked correlation with alcohol. Two thirds (the largest proportion recorded for any group) of the men were definitely drunk at the time of the offense and another 10 per cent were mildly to moderately intoxicated. Both pedophilia and force are associated with intoxication and in these aggressors we have them combined. For some 72 per cent of these men alcohol played a significant role in their lives. Specifically, 40 per cent (the largest figure recorded) had been or were alcoholic, 32 per cent had been or were frequent drinkers (again the largest percentage), only 20 per cent (the smallest figure) were moderate drinkers, and a mere 8 per cent were abstainers.

Relatively few (74 per cent) of the offenses were premeditated; in fact, this is the smallest percentage displayed by any group.

To break the two powerful taboos embodied in forced sexual acts with preadolescent girls and to disregard the singularly violent social response that such acts always bring requires some suspension or distortion of rationality, and in this case alcohol fulfills the requirement. The aggressors frequently profess an amnesia regarding their offenses or else refer to them as madness—”I must have been crazy” is a common remark.

Such drunken unpremeditated assaults are solo affairs; in none of our cases were other adult males involved in the offense. In fact, knowledge of the presence of another adult would probably have served as a deterrent in an offense against a child.

As with the offenders vs. children, the offenses involving force took place most often in residences and next most often out-of-doors. Third rank, which among the offenders vs. children was held by theaters, is held by offenses in automobiles. Public toilets account for most of the remaining cases.

The great majority, slightly more than two thirds, of the children were strangers to the offenders, 8 per cent were acquaintances, 15 per cent were friends, and 8 per cent were relatives. Comparing these figures to those for the offenders vs. children, where two fifths were strangers, it is evident that familiarity serves in some measure to prevent the use of force. Probably this is not only a concern over identification, but also reflects an anthropological axiom: humans find it easier to be cruel to strangers than to those they know.

Few (3 per cent) of the victims were aged under five, 24 per cent were five to six, 17 per cent were seven to eight, and 55 per cent were nine to eleven. As a whole, the children were older than those involved in offender vs. children cases.

Perhaps the greatest difference between the offenders vs. children and the aggressors vs. children lies in the percentages who had or attempted coitus. Among the former only 6 per cent had or attempted coitus, but among the aggressors 23 per cent attempted intromission and another 23 per cent succeeded. It is this coital behavior that se*;s the aggressors apart from the offenders and engenders resistance and force. Mouth-genital contact, which was involved in nearly one fifth of the cases, also frequently provokes fright and resistance, particularly when attempted by a stranger.

It is almost superfluous to note that the child’s behavior was overwhelmingly that of avoidance and resistance—according to the official record in some 95 per cent of the cases. The aggressors themselves painted a more favorable picture, but even they reported resistance in 65 per cent of the cases.

In nearly two fifths of the offenses the aggressors engaged in preliminary talking and caressing designed to elicit voluntary sexual cooperation, and resorted to threat and force only when these overtures failed. In the other three fifths of the cases the behavior was aggressive from the onset.

It is difficult to assess the element of threat by words or gestures. Often no mention was made of threat, or else the record merely states that threats (undescribed) were made. Actually, whether put into words or not, the element of threat exists in all forced relationships. The use of some physical force implies the possibility that greater force may be exerted. This sort of threat by implication is particularly effective when there is great disparity in strength.

We find that among the aggressors vs. children about 4 per cent employed no force but used only threats; the majority (46 per cent) used some force, one quarter employed much force, and another quarter used force to a degree that could not be ascertained. The adjective “some” would apply in instances where the force was chiefly restraint: preventing the victim from fleeing or fighting, but not inflicting injury. The adjective “much” applies where there was striking, ripping of clothing, strangling, and other violence that often resulted in injury.

In approximately two fifths of the offenses circumstances made the apprehension of the offender probable; this is a high figure. As in all offenses against children the cardinal point is whether or not the child will maintain secrecy, but where physical violence and/or threat has been used a child is less likely to protect the adult or be able to conceal the incident.

In slightly over one third of the cases we do not know how the matter came to police attention. However, among the cases for which data are available two thirds were reported by relatives or adult friends of the child. The remaining third were reported by witnesses— this high percentage being testimony to the intoxication of the males, who not infrequently made little effort to arrange privacy for their offenses.

As for admitting or denying their offenses, relatively few of the aggressors made a full admission of guilt either to the authorities (48 per cent) or to us (54 per cent). A moderate number (10-14 per cent) made qualified admissions; these were usually denials that they had used force. The striking thing is the large number who claimed amnesia as the result of intoxication and psychological upset: 14 per cent made this claim to the authorities and 21 per cent to our interviewers. A typical response was, “If they say I did it, I guess I must have, but I don’t remember a thing about it.” Of course, some of these responses were pure evasion. This left a core of 28 per cent who flatly denied their guilt to the authorities and 11 per cent inasfar as our interviewers were concerned.

The final legal plea, which frequently bears little relation to the convicted man’s admission or denial, was in only 61 per cent of the cases a plea of guilty—the second smallest proportion of guilty picas recorded.

*85\161\2*

A typical case is one of an unmarried man nearly forty, whose heterosexual life was quantitatively adequate. He was given to rather heavy drinking, especially during weekends. On one such weekend, while staying with friends, he exceeded his capacity and became so intoxicated that he had no recollection of entering the room of a nine-year-old girl and touching her genitalia. The girl protested and he left. Nothing in his prior history or in the institutional psychiatric examinations gave any forewarning of his behavior. The drunken cases typically have but one offense incident; repeated activity with children is rare.

*42\161\2*

Because you want balance, you are often not spontaneous in your actions. You need to think things through. Sometimes you find it hard to make decisions in your emotional life, and yet in other areas of your life you can be very decisive, making you the best person to have around in a crisis.

Turquoise combines well with greens, blues and oranges, as well as the colours of love – deep pink and magenta. It is important to use a small amount of another colour with turquoise to prevent over-emotionalism in a bedroom. Any colour from the red spectrum will be effective, such as red, pink or magenta. It is often used in Contemporary style bedrooms, teamed with other bright colours.

*47\74\8*

Cream is another neutral colour which is safe in home decoration. Because it contains more yellow in its base colour, it is more uplifting than beige. In all other aspects it has a similar effect to beige in that it is safe and calm. If you’re crazy for cream, you understand it creates a soft and warm bedroom environment, slightly more intimate than white and as a neutral, stands you in good stead. Cream suggests you want your intimate life to proceed smoothly.

If your room is predominantly beige

Beige is a neutral chosen by many because it is safe. It is a less intense form of brown, creating a quiet confidence and sophistication from which to build a base. If your room is predominantly beige, you have decided to be very neutral in this most intimate of rooms.

You don’t like to make waves. The overall effect can change slightly depending on the base colour within the beige, such as pinky beige, blue beige or yellow beige. If you are beckoning beige you are very careful to keep a calm atmosphere in the bedroom with very little passion or excitement to stir the emotions.

*64\74\8*

ACCESSORIES in a Romantic bedroom are soft, lacy, frilled or old world. Lamps have ornate carved bases or are softly rounded or made of antique glass. The shades are frilled, fringed or lacy, with a softly gathered look. Cushions are soft and lacy or frilled. Paintings have a very romantic feel to them, often with buxom women as the main theme, or cherubs and angels. Frames are carved, detailed or ornate, but definitely not plain. Photo frames and mirrors are ornate silver or brass, or carved wood or hand painted with ornate floral designs. Ornaments are almost always mementos or collectibles of some kind and they will have a nostalgia about them. This is the one style which is highly decorative and usually quite cluttered, creating a sensual warmth and cosiness.

*84\74\8*

Stop hanging on. Is there a reason for keeping all those things, or should you have sorted them – and the reasons – out long ago? What about those empty bottles and jars in the kitchen? What about those clothes you know you will never wear again? If you are inclined to keep too many things ‘in case they come in handy’, you have to be strong with yourself now. We know you want the best for yourself and your partner. That’s one of the reasons you are reading this book. It gives you example after example of changes you can make. What a different life you can have. Have you the courage?

Some of you feel comforted by physical clutter. Fine – it can still be well-dusted and rearranged. In your bedroom, keep everything dusted and polished. Clean the skirting boards,- dust the light fittings,- pull out the chair/drawers etc. and have a spring clean. You will have moved the molecular energy around and that’s good. Clean the window. Even move some furniture around. If it doesn’t look good in the new position, move it back. It’s amazing how your spirits will lift.

A messy and untidy bedroom can belong to any of the styles, and reflects a person who is disorganised, easygoing about most aspects of their life and a procrastinator. Or perhaps it belongs to the busy person who is trying to do too many things at once, or someone with lots of creative interests and hobbies. Don’t put it off. Sort the clutter now – one room at a time. Start with anything on the floor. If it doesn’t belong in that room move it to where it does belong, get rid of it or give it away. You don’t have to do it all at once but do get started.

How do you feel about your bedroom? Is it a general room for dumping everything or a special sanctuary away from everyday worries? Is it a reflection of inner joy, love and harmony, or a room you only use to store clothes and sleep in? Does it reflect how you feel inside or have you never given it a second thought? Do you love going into it just to admire it and relive sensual memories?

Clutter isn’t only physical. Emotional clutter can pervade our lives. Until you come to terms with the sorrow, the longings, the resentment, the anger, the hurt from your last love/marriage/ childhood/business dealing, you are swamped by emotional clutter. Forgive yourself, and in time, the other people involved. Send them love and peace. Until you can do this, you will be bruised and resentful in all areas of your life. By clearing the emotional clutter you will be in charge of your life.

*104\74\8*

You have lots of choices for comforting after play. Try some of these to complete the seduction process:

• cuddling

• talking, stroking and touching

• falling asleep comfortably in one another’s arms

• enjoying a glass a wine

• perhaps you can think of another.

Success comes from the simplest ideas. Mastery is the key.

By following the suggestions we have made you can make a difference in your intimate relationships. It is all up to you. You are in charge of your life. It’s time for new beginnings. Put aside the excuses. Let bygones be bygones and don’t let past hurts destroy the present for you. There is a wonderfully colourful future ahead.

Make a date with yourself to create the happiest and most loving life you can. Set the actual day and put it in your diary. Promise yourself from that day on you will be more sensual, more romantic, more thoughtful and more loving.

Apart from basic survival needs love is the most important dement in life. Don’t waste a minute more without it. Use this book to make positive changes in your intimate life. Have fun with it. Put laughter into your personal relationships.

Living, loving, learning and laughing is what a successful life is about. Make sure you incorporate all four into your life experiences each day. There is a universal plan for all of us and we will be directed to it if we take the time to listen to our inner voice.

*124\74\8*